Photographers and Lawyers
by Captain Omnitron
Summary: Spider-Man and She-Hulk. Two of Earth's mightiest heroes... Joining forces under one roof... To face the challenge of everyday life!
1. TV Night

Photographers and Lawyers

Spider-Man, She-Hulk, and all related characters belong to Marvel Comics.

* * *

"I still don't get this... They get superpowers from... Breathing a certain way." A well muscled green skinned woman, looking to be in her late 20's, said as she squinted slightly at the screen showing some form of anime. It was none other than Jennifer Walters, the Sensational She-Hulk. She was currently in a fairly small apartment with her boyfriend, spending a lazy Saturday night, and her significant other had suggested this particular program.

"No it's more... They had to be HIT first by a magic Italian guy and THEN they can get superpowers." A man, looking to be in his mid 20's said. He had brown hair and hazel eyes, and was wearing a red and blue spider themed costume, the gloves and boots of the costume were fling on the adjoining love seat across from the couch. It was the one and only Amazing Spider-Man. Jennifer slowly nodded at this explanation.

"And this makes sense... How?" Jennifer asked, still clearly not getting it.

"It doesn't! That's the beauty of it!" The arachnid hero said as the She-Hulk just chuckled to herself.

"Peter, this show is ridiculous you know that right?" Jennifer said as the action scene before them raged on.

"This from the lady who went nuts for a series about a guy who can end any fight with one punch?" Peter asked as Jen looked up at him for a moment, him looking down to meet her eyes.

"Yeah. I IDENTIFY with how he can feel. So does Bruce." Jennifer said as she playfully, but carefully, poked Peter in his side.

"No you identify with the fact everything bounces off his noggin while his hyper competent science partner actually has to do things like dodge." Peter said, grunting a little at the poke as the two turned their attention back to the screen.

"Oh ha. Ha. Anyways. These guys punch vampires to bloody dust?" Jennifer asked as Peter nodded.

"Yep... Blade would be so jealous." Peter smirked as Jen seemed to be thinking about something.

"With the power of the sun?" Jen asked as they kept watching.

"Yeah?" Peter answered as Jen smirked.

"... They're stealing Carol's thing." Jennifer said as Peter looked down at her, almost incredulously.

"What?! No they're not!" Peter said indignantly as Jennifer laughed.

"Drawing in the power of the sun, and/or other cosmic energies? How is that NOT what Carol does?" Jen retorted as Peter smirked.

"Ah, ah, ah my fair lady. This is only the sun, nothing else. Therefore not what Carol does. At all." Peter said, smirking in victory, not noticing a sly smile on his girlfriend's lips forming.

"Oh you're totally right... They're stealing Sunspot's thing." Jen said as Peter looked down to see her looking back up with a big smile on her face as she began to chuckle.

"Yeah... so?"He asked not really getting what she was aiming at.

"Just think it's funny how they took that from one of the most obscure X-Men is all." Jen said, smirking trying to get a rise out of Peter.

"Well technically he was a New Mutant." Peter said, fighting back a smirk of his own.

"That just proves my point." Jennifer said, now fully smiling.

"I hate you." Peter said, smiling as he leaned down to kiss her, Jennifer returning the kiss.

"Love you too Spidey." Jen said as she rubbed his cheek before both turned their attention back to the most amazingly ridiculous but amazing show ever made.

* * *

 **That ends part one. Hope you liked, expect more slice of life fun from these two in the future!**


	2. The Beard

Photographers and Lawyers

Spider-Man, She-Hulk, and all related characters belong to Marvel Comics.

* * *

Jennifer sighed as she walked into her and Peter's shared apartment, running her hands through her long green hair and shaking it out as she headed to the couch and plopped down. She had been in space with the Avengers who were helping the X-Men deal with an incident with Shi'ar and Kree for the past week and was just glad to be home. Unfortunately her boyfriend wasn't there, as before she left he had promised to help the Fantastic Four on an excursion to the Microverse. Jen groaned as she was really hoping to spend some time with Peter, but before she could think much longer on that the door opened and a familiar voice rang out causing Jen to turn and look in his direction, only to do a double take in shock.

"Oh you're back!" Peter exclaimed as he rushed over to hug his girlfriend, but Jen was still trying to figure out what she was seeing. It had been a week and Peter had seemingly grown in that short amount of time, a thick beard. It was short mind you, but it was pretty thick and covered much of his face. As Peter leaned in to kiss her on the lips, Jen reach up and plucked a hair from the beard to make sure he wasn't playing some kind of joke on her.

"OW! What was that for?!" Peter yelped as he looked at Jen with a mix of utter confusion and mild annoyance.

"Peter... Beard... How?" Was about all Jennifer could say, sounding more than a little like her cousin. Peter scratched it and laughed a bit.

"Oh yeah, time's a little weird in the Microverse so me and the FF were there for about a couple of months. Had my mask on pretty much all the time and well didn't really have time to shave anyway so yeah. Beard, you like? I like it. Can't wait to show Logan I one upped those dorky sideburns of his. You know I found him combing them once? Seriously it was..." Peter began to ramble as Jen couldn't take her bright green eyes off the beard. She was not a fan of it, not one bit. Not that she disliked beards, but on Peter it just felt... Wrong. Peter had what she considered boyish good lucks, even at 28 years old he still could largely pass for a 20 year old something he himself took pride in. But with the beard he looked a good ten years older and it just threw Jen for an absolute loop.

 _'Well if Peter likes it...'_ Jen thought to herself as she decided to silence Peter with a kiss. However the second her lips touched his she felt the mustache and beard scrap up against her upper lip and chin and despite her durability it was itchy to say the least.

"There's the welcome home kiss! Anyway I'm gonna grab a shower, and then it's nothing but spending quality time with my favorite lady." Peter said as he hopped off the couch and headed to the bathroom.

"Sounds great Pete!" Jen called out to him as she leaned her head back and stared at the ceiling.

"That beard has to go." The She-Hulk said to herself as she began to think of a way to get rid of the offending facial hair.

* * *

After spending three hours going through long overdue court files, Peter helping her, Jen came up with an idea on how to get Peter to shave. After all suddenly being a little more unavailable for kissing would be enough to get anyone to take the hint. She didn't want to be the domineering kind of girlfriend where she had to order Peter around to get what she wanted, and the fact Peter actually liked the darn thing made it all the worse but...

"And done! I don't know how you put up with this stuff Jen." Peter said as he leaned in for a kiss, but Jen not so subtly got up before he could make contact.

"Now to run these down to the office." Jen said as she headed for the door, smirking at her small victory.

 _'She-Hulk: One. Beard: Zero'_ Jen thought to herself as she fought back a devious chuckle.

"Can't you do that tomorrow?" Peter asked, as he was really in the mood for just relaxing and having some smooching time with Jen.

"Don't worry it won't take long!" Jen said as she headed out the door as Peter just shrugged.

* * *

It was ten o'clock at night when Jen got back, she saw Peter was was nowhere to be found, but saw a note on the coffee table.

"Went for patrol should be back by ten." Jen read aloud as she panicked. If she wanted to avoid the prickly menace, she needed to think quick before Peter got back. Quickly, but carefully so as not to accidentally rip yet another set of clothes, she was down to her panties and sports bra and quickly climbed into bed, rolling on her stomach and acting asleep for when Peter got back.

 _'Not my proudest moment, but Peter will take the hint soon enough.'_ Jen thought as she eventually drifted off to sleep for real.

 **TWO WEEKS LATER**

* * *

"This is getting ridiculous Carol! We haven't kissed, sex has been out of the question, and he still hasn't caught on!" Jen ranted to one of her best friends, Carol Danvers AKA Captain Marvel, about the whole affair as they sat in the kitchen of Avengers Mansion. Carol on the other hand had her mind on trying to keep from laughing, staring into her coffee mug as if it was the most interesting thing in the world to hide her smile. At this moment Captain America walked in on the two and saw Jen with her head in her hands and Carol fighting back busting a gut.

"He still has the beard doesn't he?" Cap asked as She-Hulk groaned out a frustrated yes. At this point Carol couldn't hold back anymore and began to laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation. Jen looked up, seeing Carol still laughing as Cap himself was chuckling a bit.

"Et tu Steve?" Jen asked as he cleared his throat and looked apologetic.

"Sorry Jen, but even you have to admit it's a little... Well a little silly." Steve said as he poured a cup of coffee for himself.

"You don't get it! It's prickly, it makes my face itch whenever he kisses me, it's an eyesore!" Jen exclaimed as Steve quietly excused himself and walked out of the kitchen.

"Well Jen, everyone in a relationship picks up their own unique... Quirks. Take Steve. We started dating? Tony finally managed to get him hooked on a particular form of modern entertainment." Captain Marvel said, laughing a bit as she looked back on that moment just a few months ago.

"Which is?" She-Hulk asked, almost listlessly but with a slight hint of curiosity.

"Video games. Steve Rogers, Captain freaking America... Is now a gamer thanks to Tony." Carol said, smiling at her green friend who just looked confused.

"Okay putting aside that weirdness, you're... Okay with that? I mean hey nothing against video games, Peter and I play a lot but..." Jen trailed off as she noticed Carol's smile growing bigger.

"I just... I play with him, or just sit and watch him play and it's just good quality time. I know, the beard's not the same issue, but I was in the same boat as you are right now so I just talked to Steve about it. He ended up getting me into it and it's our new thing. Just talk to Peter about it, I'm sure he'll listen." Carol said as she got up and walked out.

"Carol! Mass Effect Andromeda finished downloading!" Steve called from the living room as Carol flew straight there. Jen sat in stunned silence for a good long time after that.

"... I'll just drop bigger hints."

* * *

"Bye Jen, heading to the Bugle!" Peter called out as he headed for the door. Jen ran up to him however with a brown paper bag.

"Don't forget your lunch!" Jen said, perhaps a little too bubbly but she needed to make this convincing.

"... You never make me lunch." Peter said eyeing the bag suspiciously.

"Well I just felt like it, come on take it." Jen held the bag out for Peter to take, Peter took it and gave her a bear hug in return. A long bear hug, slowly increasing the amount of force behind it.

"Peter, not that I don't like hugs but this is a little long." Jen said as Peter let go.

"Well you're not screaming about a broken back so you're not Chameleon or Mysterio so it's not a trap. Anyway thanks love you bye!" Peter ran out the door before Jen could register what he just said. Jen did however and smiled.

* * *

"Let's see, ham sandwich, chips..." Peter dug through the lunch Jen packed him and found something really odd at the bottom.

"Shaving cream and a disposable razor... I think I see where this is going."

* * *

"Jen I'm home! I found your little surprise and really all you had to do was ask and I'd have shaved." Peter called as Jen walked to the front door.

 _'Yes! Victory!'_ Jen thought as she turned the corner to the door and... Saw Peter with his head shaved and the beard still in place. Jen fainted dead away as Peter laughed. He pulled the skull cap off the top of his head, showing his still intact hair.

"Like I said all you had to do was ask, but maybe next time you'll learn to do that instead of avoiding me like the plague for two weeks." Peter said to her unconscious form as he moved her to the couch.

"Well old buddy, it's been fun." Peter said as he rubbed the beard and headed to the bathroom, shaving cream and razor in hand.

"But Spidey gotta have it!

* * *

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	3. Secrets and Lies But not really

Photographers and Lawyers

Spider-Man, She-Hulk, and all related characters belong to Marvel Comics.

* * *

It was a sunny afternoon on a rooftop as Spider-Man listened to his portable police scanner, while She-Hulk was just lounging on the roof reading one of Peter's old comics.

"I still don't get how it took these two this long to get married." Jennifer said, Peter glancing over to see her green fingers partially blocking what looked to be an S logo on the cover of the comic.

"Yeah well secret identity and all that jazz." Spider-Man replied as he unstuck himself from the wall and stretched a bit.

"Still just glasses? I mean if I wasn't public already I could've had an easier secret identity than that. Wallflower Jennifer to Sensational She-Hulk. Perfect cover." Jen said, smirking a bit as Peter chuckled to himself.

"You know sometimes it amazes me how similar we are." Peter said, plopping down on the ledge next to her.

"How do you mean?" Jen asked, clearly not getting what he was implying.

"I mean, we both kind of have that duality going on even if you're a lot more public with it. I mean take me for instance, mask and costume off and not in action? I'm a wallflower too for the most part, but mask and costume go on? I'm me. Nothing stopping me from acting how I want act, it's one reason despite everything that's happened since then? I love being Spider-Man. For me it's like you going from Regular Jen to Hulk Sized Jen so me from Plain old Peter to Amazing, Spectacular, Ultimate, you get the point." Spidey finished as She-Hulk nodded, smiling a bit at him.

"Yeah, I guess that's why we work so well isn't it? Also, serious question time... How is it I just get Savage or Sensational and you get Amazing, Spectacular, and Ultimate?" Jen asked poking him lightly in the side, Peter laughed and thought for a moment.

"Well actually Ben had the Sensational moniker too when he was Spider-Man for a while, but..." Peter trailed off, smirking beneath his mask as Jen gave him a playful glare.

"Hey if it makes you feel any better I could never pull of Savage Spider-Man... Well Venom could pull off Savage but still." Peter said as he got up, Jen following him.

"Anyway this does make me realize something... Now yeah I'm not saying now or anything but in the future... How WOULD we handle the ya know... Secret identity thing?" Peter asked as Jennifer looked rather confused.

"What secret identity thing?" She-Hulk asked as Peter loaded up the police scanner, both of them ready to go back home.

"I mean yeah we live together, people know I'm dating you... Harry still can't believe I pulled that off and yeah you've dated other guys before, non powered guys so it's par for the course for you dealing with that but... None of those other guys had a secret identity so if things keep going like they're going and we ya know... Get a lot more serious... How're we gonna handle that? I mean I already have to change about five blocks away and walk home the rest of the way after patrol just to be careful." Peter said as Jen just laughed.

"I think you answered your own question there Pete. I mean I'm not telling you to do it by any stretch of the imagination, but... Have you considered going public? I mean hell Matt's doing pretty well and when it comes to crazy bad guys he's got you beat." Jen said as Peter tilted his head, and despite his mask still being on she could detect the "really" look he was giving her.

"Look all I'm saying is, let's just see how this goes first alright? I mean... I don't want to say we're always gonna be together right now but..." Jen started but Peter cut her off.

"But we need to see if this really is going to go somewhere really serious, like really really serious, before hand right?" Peter asked as Jen nodded.

"I mean... I guess moving in together was the first big step but... Heh, I guess both of us aren't that skilled at this whole dating thing huh?"

"I mean between the two of us we've dated... What? A thousand people each?" Peter said, making Jen laugh.

"Sounds like you're low-balling it but yeah." Jen said as she put her arm around him.

"I gotta say though, so far? I wouldn't mind it." She-Hulk said as Spider-Man went into the small tool shed on the roof top to change his clothes.

"Mind what?" Peter asked, stepping out in his street clothes.

"Being 'really really serious' with you... someday." Jen said as Peter chuckled.

"Really really really serious?" Peter asked as he wrapped his arms around her and looked up smiling.

"Killing the mood a bit Peter." Jen said smirking.

"Right shutting up." Peter nodded as Jen just laughed

"Yeah I'll believe that one when Bruce stops going through 20 pairs of pants a week."

* * *

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	4. World's Mightiest Mortals!

Photographers and Lawyers

Spider-Man, She-Hulk, and all related characters belong to Marvel Comics.

* * *

It was TV night once more at the Walters/Parker home, more specifically binge night. While the two had hectic schedules most of the time, most days being chaotic at best, they always sat aside a few nights a week for personal time with each other. While said personal time included a variety of things, from gaming to movies, to more shall we say intimate affairs, Friday nights were strictly for binge watching shows they had missed in their initial run on TV, seasons of shows still ongoing, or something entirely different. As an ad played, they got settled on the couch, Jen's large green arms stretching out before placing one arm around Peter, with Peter laid his hand on her thigh. However this particular add caught there interest as it went on, showing a foster kid beating up bullies that were picking on his disabled foster brother... And then...

 _"..._ _I choose you as champion..."_

Peter and Jen were honestly wondering where this was going, and paused the ad... Seeing it was a trailer for a certain film. Both looked at each other with devious smiles.

"Should we Ms. Walters?" Peter asked with a small evil chuckle.

"Indeed we should Mr. Parker." Jennifer said as she rubbed her hands together mischievously.

 **The Next Day**

* * *

"Hey Carol, did you hear they're making a Captain Marvel movie?" Spider-Man said casually as he walked past one Carol Danvers in the hall of Avengers Mansion. The current Captain Marvel paused in her step, as she looked at him.

"I wasn't told about that, I have a clear legal claim to have these things run by me to make sure a portion of the box office goes to charity." Carol said as Spider-Man shrugged, and called out into the living area of the mansion.

"Hey Jen! Can you get the trailer up for the Captain Marvel movie on the big TV? Carol hasn't seen it!" The Webhead called as he lead the way for the good Captain. At this Captain America entered the hall from the gym and looked at both of them.

"What's this about a movie Carol?" Steve asked as she shrugged, just as in the dark as him as She-Hulk poked her head into the hall from the living room.

"There's a Captain Marvel movie, and Carol hasn't seen the trailer for it yet." Jen explained as Peter and Carol walked past her, Steve following suit.

"Really? This I gotta see." Steve said as Jen then smirked at Peter, who gave her an excited thumbs up, though no one seemed to notice. As soon as everyone was seated on the couch, the big screen the trailer began to play.

 _"You've run from foster homes in six counties."_

 _"I can take care of myself."_

Carol looked confused to say the least, Steve as well, with Peter and Jen already starting to hold back snickering.

 _"Everyone this is Billy Batson, make sure you make him feel at home."_

At this realization struck Steve's face, as he looked over at Spider-Man and She-Hulk who were clearly fighting a losing battle at holding back the laughter.

 _"They seem nice, but don't buy it. It gets real Game of Thrones around here... Dude I'm just messing with ya."_

As the trailer went on Carol's confusion just kept growing more and more, her brow furrowing the more the trailer went on.

 _"Say my name so my powers may flow through you."_

 _"But I don't know your name sir..."_

 _"Shazam..."_

 _"... Are you serious?"_

 _"SAY IT!"_

 _"OKAY! Shazam?"_

And Carol and everyone present beheld as a 14 year old boy turned into a fully grown man in a red costume with a bright white cape in gold trim with a glowing lightning bolt on his chest.

 _"You have super strength!"_

 _"I'm bulletproof!"_

 _"Hey what's up? I'm a superhero!"_

The trailer ended and the words Captain Marvel flashed across the screen. Carol was silent for a few LONG moments before taking a deep breath.

"What was that? I mean seriously what WAS that?! Is there a new Captain Marvel running around I don't know about or..." The blond woman said before Peter and Jen busted out laughing, Carol looked at them in surprise before she noticed Steve was also laughing a little to himself too.

"Carol, meet the ORIGINAL Captain Marvel... From the 40's." Peter said in between laughs as Carol's attention went to Steve.

"Yeah Carol uh, before Mar-Vell there was another Captain Marvel. A comic book back in the 40's, kid named Billy Batson, meets a wizard and says a magic word to turn into a superhero. I used to read it all the time during downtime during the war. Everyone did, those comics outsold Superman comics of all things. Heck I was a real superhero back then and he outsold me!" The Sentinel of Liberty said as he was still chuckling, Carol noticed Jen was still laughing, as she slowly forced herself to stop.

"Okay so I, have to know... Say it." She-Hulk said as Carol looked at her oddly.

"Say what?" The half-alien heroine asked.

"Say S-H-A-Z-A-M." Jen spelled out as Carol thought to herself.

"Shazam?" She said as Spider-Man leaped behind the couch

"HIT THE DECK!" He yelled as She-Hulk put up her hands to "shield" herself.

"What? No lightning today?" Jen said as she began to laugh once more, her hands dropping as Peter just cackled from the floor behind the couch. Steve for his part got up and wrapped his arm around Carol.

"Hey it still looks like a good movie." He said as Carol sighed.. And smiled.

"Yeah it does. Though I wonder something." She said as he looked at her with an eyebrow raised.

"What's that?" Cap asked as Carol pointed at the pair still laughing their hearts out.

"Are we sure THEY aren't secretly kids?"

* * *

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